is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
