Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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