Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
