Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Never underestimate the power of titties
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
