I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
