You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
