Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
