better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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