It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
