Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
