I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
kristin has been a bad kristin
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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