you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
it hurts more in the daytime
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
