Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
