i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
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