you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
