Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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