he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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