Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Randomize
