If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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