Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
