If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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