were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
