I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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