It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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