It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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