i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
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