who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
