You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
