i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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