I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
