you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
