...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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