I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
