That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
