White coat. Heels.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
