He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize