You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
