He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Randomize