I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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