Ambien. No doubt about it.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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