How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
