I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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