real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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