The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
so explain again why im purple
no
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
