i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
