i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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