me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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