Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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