so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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