sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
